Healthy Interrelational Spiritual Practice

This form of praying with one another might be a little difficult at first for many. It is entering into a way of relating to one another that is unfamiliar and spiritually intimate. As with anything that has the power to be transformative and deeply healing, it also can evoke relational difficulties. When many spiritual practices seek to avoid this sometimes-messy space, they further segment and reinforce our unhealthy individualism and miss the great potential and potency of a nurturing and loving collective field.

But we need to be heartful and healthy about it!

We seek to engage in this as an intentional spiritual practice. We are all learning and developing together, so we have the freedom to experiment and offer without knowing for sure if we are getting it exactly right. Because we are in a safe space with a committed group sharing similar intentions and divine love, we can choose to trust one another in the process. It takes time to learn discernment and deepen in our awareness of spiritual knowing in this consciousness. Everything we offer is given freely and lovingly, and with the humility and grace to say, “here’s what I’m experiencing,” take it or leave it. There is no authority over anyone in what we are sharing for one another.

We are all at different places of development and learning in our practice, and that’s completely ok. So we don’t need to compare to others or compete in any way—this is not a practice where our ego is in charge. We don’t need to worry about performance anxiety or what others are thinking. We are simply coming as we are, where we are, to try to learn and develop a little more each time.

WeSpace Groups are containers of “holding loving space” for one another—to bless one another, for strengthening, comforting, and encouraging one another. Everything we share with one another should be with this guiding discernment. If we sense any pain, negative energy, or struggle, we simply hold it in love. As we hold it, often another movement of spirit comes with something to bring encouragement, strength, or comfort with it. But not always.

We want to be careful to discern that we are not putting our own projections on others. And as receivers, we can often sense if what is shared is an authentic message for our spirit to take in. If it isn’t, we don’t hold any ill-will toward the other, as they are learning in their practice also. We all get better at this with more practice and loving feedback either in the moment or afterward.

We are also not trying to fix one another, give advice, correct, diagnose, warn, or teach anyone anything. It is always a process to recognize our own compulsions and well-meaning ways that we often try to rescue others. That is operating from our ordinary consciousness rather than the awakened knowing and being with one another in freedom and empowering care. We do our best to stay off the drama triangle of becoming a rescuer, a persecutor, or a victim.

This way of praying is not a psychic reading, though some of the same spiritual faculties are at work. While it’s tantalizing to delight in another way of knowing, and we can enjoy these developments in ourselves and the shared experiences of mystical knowing, the point is always to focus on how what is coming forth is enhancing our way of being together and the life being offered to one another. We are not prescriptive with any indications of what “ought to” or “needs” to be done, but rather we are simply describing what is coming forth and leaving the actions and discernment to the receiver.

The things that are shared can touch us deeply and speak to us in profound ways. Many find it helpful to take notes, writing down the things people share—not only to help remember (they can be fleeting in our memory afterward, almost dream-like), but also because a lot of times the metaphors and pictures need time and space to soak into us. And you can offer feedback if you like, “that really fits with my experience” or “I’ll have to think about that.” We also shouldn’t be too quick to try to interpret or “make sense” of what is shared, especially with our minds alone.

This may seem like a lot of guidelines, as I’ve tried to be quite thorough here from what we’ve learned and experienced in the groups over the years. Most of these come naturally to us if we are in a loving and safe space, but it’s helpful to have a strong sense of ways that the practice can occasionally stray into less-healthy situations.